Year of the Dog

So the Chinese New Year is almost upon us and I find myself curious to the lore and superstitions surrounding a holiday that most people in America recognize as a fireworks display and parade.
The fact of the matter is this is a holiday with a rich and diverse history. Unlike the New Year’s Eve that is normally recognized by copious amounts of alcohol accompanied by a half hearted attempt to verbalize “resolutions” that not only are bound to be forgotten as the hangover fades but are unrealistic in nature…the Chinese New Year is 15 days long with each day having it’s own symbolic meaning.
I am here dear reader to share what I’ve learned about this:
Chinese New Year begins on the first New Moon of the year (and as such the date is altered accordingly), it ends 15 days later on the Full Moon that follows. Tonight being New Year’s Eve there will be a place setting at the dinner table for the ancestors of the family. The spirit of the ancestors celebrates on this night with the family for one communal celebration. The communal feast called "surrounding the stove" or weilu. Symbolizes family unity and honors the past and present generations.

I also discovered the following superstitions regarding this holiday (please note, these are a general collection and not reflective of all regions of China):

All debts are to be paid prior to the New Year starting and nothing should be lent on this day, as anyone who does so will be lending all the year.

Everyone should refrain from using foul language and bad or unlucky words. Negative terms and the word "four" (Ssu), which sounds like the word for death, are not to be uttered.

Death and dying are never mentioned and ghost stories are totally taboo.

If you cry on New Year's day, you will cry all through the year. Therefore, children are tolerated and are not spanked, even though they are mischievous.

On New Year's Day, you are not supposed to wash your hair because it would means you would have washed away good luck for the New Year.

Red clothing is preferred during this festive occasion. Red is considered a bright, happy color, sure to bring the wearer a sunny and bright future.

It is believed that appearance and attitude during New Year's sets the tone for the rest of the year.

Children and unmarried friends, as well as close relatives are given lai see, little red envelopes with crisp one dollar bills inserted, for good fortune.

The first person one meets and the first words heard are significant as to what the fortunes would be for the entire year.

It is a lucky sign to see or hear songbirds or red-colored birds or swallows.

It is considered unlucky to greet anyone in their bedroom so that is why everyone, even the sick, should get dressed and sit in the living room.

Do not use knives or scissors on New Year's Day as this may cut off fortune.

The entire house should be cleaned before New Year's Day. On New Year's Eve, all brooms, brushes, dusters, dust pans and other cleaning equipment are put away. Sweeping or dusting should not be done on New Year's Day for fear that good fortune will be swept away. After New Year's Day, the floors may be swept. Beginning at the door, the dust and rubbish are swept to the middle of the parlor, then placed in the corners and not taken or thrown out until the fifth day. At no time should the rubbish in the corners be trampled upon. In sweeping, there is a superstition that if you sweep the dirt out over the threshold, you will sweep one of the family members away. Also, to sweep the dust and dirt out of your house by the front entrance is to sweep away the good fortune of the family; it must always be swept inwards and then carried out, then no harm will follow. All dirt and rubbish must be taken out the back door.
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I like this celebration; I like the cultural fecundity of the whole thing as well as the chance for New Beginnings. I am going to embrace the following tradition with my whole heart as I welcome the Year of the Dog: It is believed that references to the past year are to be avoided as everything should be turned toward the New Year and a new beginning.

SO here is to new beginnings and to all my friends and family I wish you all: Xin nian yu kuai!

So Hollow…

Today I am mourning again for the dissolution of a relationship where I was not the best person I could be, he was not the best person he could be, but I loved him anyway. I was recently contacted by Barry and while the anger is gone, talking to him on the phone was like a sharp knife being stabbed deep into my core being. In this last month I have been devoid of emotional responses as I attempted to cauterize the pain of losing someone so close to me.

I have dated and laughed and conducted business as usual, but at the same time entered an almost manic level of shutting off any feelings I had for this person (and in the process feelings for everyone else has been blocked as well).

So today I am again going through the pain of fresh loss as hearing his voice and reading his words reopened the wound and I now feel like my life energy is pouring out of me in copious amounts.

At the same time I am entering into a new and beautiful relationship with myself and with a really wonderful man. He is like a soothing balm on my battered soul and for the loss I feel right now I also feel like I am coming into myself and am strengthened by the desire to enter into this new situation whole. So here I am…mourning yet recognizing that this is a necessary time to experience.

My friend Jen gave me this song and it struck such a chord in me that it is my official “song of this week”

"Goodbye My Lover"

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?'
Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your head.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I am a dreamer but when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bare my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.

-James Blunt

Dead Monkeys and Martini’s

I recently had the opportunity to travel to Las Vegas for business. I spent a week of long hard days on the tradeshow and even longer nights on the dance floor. I tapped into resources of energy I didn’t even realize I had. For the first time in my adult life I partied like the 20-somethinger I am. It was so much fun and it lit a torch under my behind to remember that I am still young, hot and this world is full of untapped potential. Now I mention my trip as I discovered on this trip a love for something called the Key Lime Martini. Now for those of you who have not yet met this confectioner’s dream, picture if you will Key Lime pie in a drink that makes you tipsy. It has key lime liquor, vanilla vodka and a graham cracker rim…hmmmhhmmm. This martini (girlie drink and all) marked for me a turning point in my life. I have never had a taste for hard liquor and have glanced enviously at friends and family as they did scotch on the rocks or whiskey straight up or even more recently something as simple as a cosmos. I am simply put a girlie drink drunk. Being able to order something with vodka in it has filled me with pride.

Now is the time in my blog where I tell the worst joke ever given to me…you ready for this one…seriously...don’t say I didn’t warn you…
Why did the monkey fall out of the tree
Cause it was dead
Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree
Cause it was dead
Now, why did the 3rd monkey fall out of the tree
Peer Pressure

This was a joke given to me by a man who was attempting to take me out…as I told him
Dead monkeys do not impress!